The Date From Hell
by L.D. Eddy
Summary: Edward is getting very, very persistent. Clarice gets a little revenge. And then something unexpected. For SwordStitcher! Includes Dead Switch, Reaper's Best Friend!
1. Chapter 1

Edward glared at the screen. What was she doing with that-that-that lesser being? That human-shaped monkey? A magnanimous moron without any ability to form a sentence with more than a handful of syllables?

* * *

"What is wrong with her?" Riddler demanded, bursting into Jonathan's so-called office – really, it was just a small room with a desk and a chair and not much else.

Jonathan sighed before rubbing his face. "Who? What is wrong with _who_, Edward?"

"Your employee-"

"**Friend**."

"Your _friend_ then! What is wrong with her."

"I have no idea. I'm sure she must be mentally unstable," Jonathan said, his voice dead in a monotonous tone. "Why? What did she do _this_ time?"

"She's parading around with-with-with a thug!" Edward raged, bringing his cane down on Jonathan's desk.

"Kindly refrain yourself from breaking my things, Edward. That includes Clarice," He snapped. He paused before tacking on sarcastically, "A thug. The horror."

"Why would she date a thug when I, _**Edward Nigma**_, am the perfect boyfriend!" The man raged. Jonathan stared at him. His hair was the epitome of a disaster, and not in what women thought was an attractive way. His suit was stained with blood and dirt. His face was screwed into a manic look of anger.

"Gee, I really don't know, Edward," Jonathan deadpanned.

* * *

Clarice stared down at her phone before sighing and looking around the diner. Where the hell was he?

She dialed the number and waited.

It went to voicemail. _Great. I always feel awkward leaving messages._

"Hey, um, Ollie. It's me. Clarice. I don't know, maybe you forgot, but we kinda had a date planned. Just...call me back when you can, okay?" She said. "Um, bye."

She hung up.

Honestly, the whole thing was fishy. He never missed any of her calls and he was always early for their dates. And if he was going to miss one, he'd call her. What was so important that he'd skip their date?

* * *

"Why exactly are we doing this?" Switch asked. Oh no. She could see that look on his face. The one where he turned into a raging ball of genius-psycho.

But...it just faded away.

"Mister Langley here needs to be taught a lesson."

"What kind of lesson?"

"Not to touch my things."

"Wait," Switch looked down of the face of the man and groaned. "She's gonna hate you."

"What do you mean, she's going to hate me?" Riddler demanded, swinging around to glare at her.

"You're going to kill her boyfriend."

"Oh, I'm not going to kill him. His own stupidity will."

* * *

"Hello, Mister Langley," Edward's voice came through the speaker. Ollie startled and let out a surprised grunt.

"What the fuck? Where am I?" He demanded, pushing his hands against the glass walls of the deathtrap.

"Ah, ah, ah, Mister Langley. The question is; where will you be if you can't get out of my trap?"

"Why?"

"You thugs should watch who you associate with, Mister Langley. I don't appreciate other people playing with my toys," Edward said darkly. "Now. Are you going to be a stain on that wall, the floor, the ceiling? Or all of the above? Oh, and just to warn you, even though I really shouldn't, you only have a certain amount of time before you automatically lose."

"And by lose what do you mean? What do I lose?"

"Why, your life. Honestly I thought that was obvious."

* * *

_**A/N: For SwordStitcher! Enjoy!**_


	2. Chapter 2

"Back so soon?" Jonathan asked, looking at Clarice. She had a frown set on her face and looked upset. "Date go bad? Do you want me to gas him?"

"I should. He never showed up," Clarice said, taking her coat off and draping it over her chair. Jonathan rolled his eyes.

"Edward probably kidnapped him." Clarice narrowed her eyes and turned to look at her friend.

"What do you mean, 'Edward probably kidnapped him'?" She demanded.

"Well, earlier he came in here raging about how you were parading around with some brainless thug and then he got that look in his eyes – you know the one where he looks like he's going to rip your innards out and feast on them? – and he just stormed out."

"I am going to kill that bastard!" Clarice yelled. She grabbed her coat and threw it on and left, slamming the door behind her.

"And she wonders why we can't have nice things in the lair," He muttered to himself. "Either she slams the door and something falls over or Edward manages to break it in one of his fits."

* * *

"Where is he?" Clarice demanded, slamming her hands down on Riddler's desk. He looked up at her and smirked.

"Where is who, my dear?" He asked.

She slapped him.

"Where is my _boyfriend_?" She demanded.

"Your **boyfriend**? I thought _I_ was your boyfriend, Reaper," He said, his voice dropping dangerously as his eyes gained a manic glint.

"You thought wrong," Clarice said, nervously eying the red mark on his face. "Where. Is. Ollie?"

Riddler snorted in derision. "**That's** his name? Ollie?"

"It's short for Oliver. Where is he?"

"In several places," He said, grabbing his drink. She smacked it out of his hand.

"Why?" She demanded.

"He didn't answer the riddle correctly. Nor did he escape in time." He smirked despite the heat radiating from the cheek she'd slapped.

She fumed silently, her eyes scrunched shut and her hands in fists.

"I hate you," She muttered quietly.

"I'm aware," He grinned. She opened her eyes and leaned up against the desk.

"I liked Ollie," She sulked.

"Too bad."

"Drop dead." He frowned.

"Is that **truly** what you want, Reaper?" Riddler asked, taking her hands in his. She glared at him.

"Yes," She answered petulantly.

"Oh, I doubt that."

"Still crusading to prove you're the perfect boyfriend, huh?" She spat angrily, yanking her hands from his hold.

"Of course."

"Good boyfriends don't kill the competition," She turned away from him and pouted.

"Yes, well, according to you, we aren't dating."

"Yet, according to you, we are."

"Well," He said, smirking. He stood and tried to wrap his arms around her. She shoved him away and glared at the floor. "I must be a good enough boyfriend for there to even be a competition in your eyes," He pressed.

She blanched before she started to walk away. "I'm leaving. Tell Switch I'm at our bar."

He frowned. "**Your** bar?" Since when had the two owned a bar? Together?

"She'll get what I mean."

* * *

_**A/N: For SwordStitcher! Again!**_

_**Stitcher:**_

_**He didn't even survive one. Wah-wah-waaaaaaaah!**_

_**It's getting started!**_


	3. Chapter 3

"What happened to you?" Reaper asked, gaping at her friend. Switch limped her way into the Iceberg.

"Riddler and I had a disagreement," She muttered evasively. Clarice narrowed her eyes and crossed her arms.

"Over what?" She demanded. Switch desperately pointed up to the clip in her hair which, she noticed, hid an almost invisible, incredibly small fish eye camera.

"Oh, you know," Switch muttered, taking her seat. "You. I need a good drink."

"Me? Why me?" Reaper asked, shocked. She turned and flagged over the bartender. "Vodka rocks. Oh, and a thing of ice and some napkins."

"Sure thing," the woman said.

"What do you mean? 'Why you?' Isn't it obvious?"

"Apparently not." The bartender came back with their order and Reaper reached into the tub to grab some ice. She wrapped them in the napkins and pressed them to the purple-black bruise on Switch's cheek. "Geesh, kid. He did you good," She muttered. Switch glared at her before grabbing her drink and downing it in one go.

"Another," She told the bartender. She looked back over at Reaper and sighed before she snatched the home-made ice pack from her hand. "He'll not be feeling too good right about now, either," Switch replied as she juggled the ice pack. "You know what Nigma's like when he gets an idea into his head. It's impossible to get it out."

"Is he that serious?" Clarice groaned as she passed the refilled glass over.

"Oh, yeah," Switch said. She sighed before looking Clarice in the eyes. "For the sake of my health, can't you just...humour him?" She pleaded.

Clarice glared at her for a moment before a glint came over her eyes. "Well, I suppose. But...I'll only accept the best restaurants and events in Gotham."

Switch choked on the spirits. "What?! 'Rice, what're you-"

Clarice shushed her before pointing to the camera in Switch's hair and smiling devilishly. "I won't be seen with just anyone, anywhere you know."

"Oh, God," Switch groaned. "You know this is going to backfire."

"Oh, I doubt that," Clarice said, smirking.

* * *

"Won't be seen with just anyone, anywhere?" Riddler muttered, staring at the image of Reaper on-screen. He leaned back, fixed his tie, and smirked. "Well, if she wants the best, the best she shall receive. Perhaps I'll call Oswald and reserve the private room," He sighed. "No, no, that won't do. She wants the best, and while Oswald and his staff may be hospitable, The Iceberg Lounge isn't the best." He frowned. Perhaps he should call Jonathan. The man knew more about her than Switch did, if only just barely.

He grabbed his phone and called the self proclaimed 'Master of Fear'.

"What do you want?" Jonathan barked into the phone once he answered.

"What does Reaper like?" Riddler demanded.

"Clarice?"

"Yes. How many other Reapers do you know, Jonathan?"

"Don't tell me she agreed to a voluntary date with you," Jonathan said.

"Not yet. But she will."

"Oh, really? And how did you figure that?"

"I have a reputable source that claims that she'll say yes."

"Yeah, well," Jonathan snorted. "Good luck with that."

* * *

_**A/N: For Stitcher!**_

_**Stitcher:**_

_**Those poor, dumb idiots...We shall mourn them. BUT IT SHALL NOT BE AT THIS MOMENT! Wow, that sounds angrier than I meant it. And yeah, she's pretty ballsy, but that's how the idiot is when she gets angry. Thank God, Thank God...though, of course, Reaper probably doesn't think of it that way.**_


	4. Chapter 4

"I am **not** responsible for this. I think I need that in writing," Switch moaned.

"Oh, lighten up, this is going to be fun," Clarice laughed. She reached up and plucked the camera from it's resting place and dropped it in the ice bucket. "Now, tell me, what does he hate the most? And what can I pick on about him?"

"I am having no part of this!" Switch protested.

"C'mon, Switchy, just a hint? He made you look like Quazimodo just to spy on me," She pointed out.

"Fine," Switch groaned. "He hates psychology when directed on him, he loathes people who interrupt him, he has a teddy called Epicurus-"

"Epicurus?" Reaper interrupted. "Why the hell Epicurus?"

"It's the name of a dead philosopher."

"Of course he'd pick something totally boring for the name of a teddy bear," Clarice paused and a devilish smile slipped onto her mouth. "I just had the most evil idea."

"What?" Switch asked, slightly afraid of the glint in her eyes and the smile on her face.

"All guys hate clingy, right?" She asked.

"Please, don't, for the sake of my spleen."

"Your spleen can kiss my a-"

"Please?"

"I was just thinking I could play 'psycho girlfriend'," Clarice said, smiling. Switch rested her head in her hands, dropping the icepack on the bar.

"Is it still too late to protest innocence?"

"Oh, come on, one date is all it'll take. I can guarantee it," Clarice told her confidently.

"It _is_ too late, isn't it?" Switch moaned. "Fine," She said sarcastically. "Let's try things your way."

"Hey, _cheer up_!" Reaper grinned. "At least the swelling's going down."

Switch grumbled.

* * *

"What do you think?" Reaper asked, turning to display the dress she'd grabbed from the rack.

Switch groaned from under the pile of dresses. "If I could see it, I'd tell you. Can you just try these on first? _Please_?"

"**Fine**."

"Why are we even buying these? He hasn't even asked you on a date yet!"

"It's always best to be prepared, Kid." Switch sighed. She'd long since given up on protesting the name Reaper insisted on calling her.

* * *

He fixed his tie, checked his cufflinks, and looked down at the rose.

One rose. Singular.

For whatever reason, she preferred to have small amounts of flowers. Well, according to Jonathan.

And the damned thing was yellow.

Apparently yellow was one of her favorite colors.

"Are you going in or what?" Switch asked from his side. He glared down at her before raising his hand and knocking on the door.

It opened and Jonathan peered out.

"What are you doing here?" He asked. Then he saw the rose. "Oh. That. Get in," He moved aside and the two walked into the lair.

Clarice looked up from her book and her eyes narrowed before she smiled.

"What are you two doing here?" She asked. "I didn't know you were coming over. Did you know, Jonathan?"

Jonathan shook his head and sat down on the couch and grabbed his book.

"No. I didn't. Come on, Nigma, say your piece then leave."

"You. Leave," Riddler said, looking pointedly at Dead Switch. She rolled her eyes but walked down the hall to Clarice's room.

"I suppose you'll be wanting me to leave as well?" Jonathan asked.

"If you would, Jonathan," He said. Jonathan rolled his eyes but stalked over to his room and closed the door.

Clarice's eyebrows bunched up in confusion. "What are you doing, Edward?" She asked warily. He crossed the room quickly on his long legs and stood in front of her awkwardly. _Well. Here goes nothing,_ he thought.

"Well, Clarice, I was just wondering if-" He froze. He was actually doing this. He cleared his throat. "I was wondering if you would-" Oh, God, what if she rejected him like all of the other women he'd asked out before? "If you would go on a date-" Why was he getting so tongue tied? He knew she'd say yes! "With me." He hastily held the rose out as soon as he remembered it was in his hand. She smiled and took it.

"How'd you know my favorite color was yellow?" She teased.

"Well, a man of my stature knows things, Reaper," He said.

"Okay."

"Hmm?"

"Okay. I'll go on a date with you."

"You will?"

"Yes," She said, smiling. He smirked.

If only he'd noticed the devilish glint in her eyes or the secret hidden behind her smile.

* * *

_**A/N: For Stitcher and Batty!**_

_**Stitcher:**_

_**NO! NO, IT IS NOT TODAY! Lol. And yeah, it's totally "Oh, God! NO!" Not Thank God.**_

_**Batty:**_

_**Don't worry, I'm working on it. I bet I'll have it done by Ten my time. :)**_


	5. Chapter 5

"Thanks for the ride, Switchy," Clarice said, smiling at her friend.

"Yeah, yeah. The reservation is under Nashton. Don't make him hate you too much," Switch said irritably.

"I'll try my best," Clarice said. She got out of the car and walked into the restaurant. And frowned. What-

The place was beautiful. It was exactly a place that she'd go to if she were on a true date. In fact, now that she thought about it, she remembered mentioning something of the sort to-

"Jonathan," she hissed, glaring at her surroundings.

"Oh, can I help you miss?" A woman asked. She turned to see a beautifully dressed hostess.

"Um, yes. Table for two? Under Nashton?" She asked. The woman smiled.

"Right this way, Ms. Shawe," She said. "Follow me."

How the hell did the hostess know her name? She eyed the woman warily.

* * *

Switch drove back to the Scare-Lair and sighed. What the hell was she supposed to do now?

Well, if she remembered correctly, Clarice had Sherlock on DVD.

She smirked. They were friends. Clarice wouldn't mind her watching her shows.

She got out of the car and walked into the lair, pausing when she reached the living area.

Scarecrow was watching TV.

And not just any TV show.

"You watch Sherlock?" Switch demanded. Scarecrow whipped around and fixed her with a glare.

"What are you doing here?"

"Riddler and 'Rice are on a date. I have nothing to do," Switch told him. She plopped down on the couch. "Ooh, the Baskerville episode!"

"Shut up."

"Fine."

* * *

"Wow, Edward this place is gorgeous," Clarice gushed.

Edward smiled. "Well, only the best for-"

"And the food is amazing," She interrupted. He frowned. "It's as if you know exactly what I like!" He froze.

"Well, I just guessed-"

"The Riddler guessed? Really?" Clarice teased. "Next thing I know, you'll be telling me you got _help_ from Jonathan and Switch." His eye started to twitch.

"Well, if one must, one-"

"So-"

"Dammit, woman! Would you quit interrupting me?" He yelled. Honestly, he couldn't get a word in edge-wise. She was lucky he didn't snap her ne- _What was she doing?_

Her lip started to tremble. _What?_

It was quivering now, now it was quivering! _Oh God, don't tell me she's going to-_

"Why are you yelling at me?" She cried. He watched as fat tears started to roll out of her eyes.

"Oh, no, dear," He fumbled. _What should he do? What should he do? Boyfriends aren't supposed to make their girlfriends __**cry**__!_

"What did I do?" Clarice demanded as she cried and tried to wipe away her tears.

"Oh, dear, um, you didn't- you didn't do anything!" He tried to console her. _Why? Why did he have to yell at her?_ "It's me, it's me, I'm just- I get angry when people interrupt me. I'm sorry, I'm so sorry!"

"Y-you're sorry?" Clarice asked, her voice incredibly quiet. "Really?" Riddler got out of his chair and knelt by her.

"I am truly, truly sorry my dear," He said.

"Okay!" Clarice said, perking right up.

Wh-What? That's all it took? Every other time he did something to make her angry, she held a grudge! For months!

* * *

The lights flicked off.

"What the fuck?" Switch whined.

"It appears the power has gone out," Scarecrow grumbled angrily. Switch rolled her eyes.

"So...you wanna do anything?" She asked, turning to look at Scarecrow – or, rather, where she thought he was.

"Absolutely not," He snapped.

"Alrighty then."

* * *

_**A/N:  
Stitcher:**_

_**I know! I'm starting to feel bad for him too! Poor little Eddy!**_


	6. Chapter 6

"I'm going to teach those lazy ingrates at the power plant a thing or two about blackouts," Switch snarled. "And right when he was about to jump, too."

"The best bit," Jonathan said angrily.

"Do we actually agree on something?" Switch asked, shock lacing her voice.

"Don't ever mention it. Ever."

"They'd never believe me," She quipped back.

_**Thunk**_

"What was that?" Switch demanded, turning toward a noise.

"What was what?" Scarecrow asked.

"I thought I heard something," Switch said.

"It's all in your head. No one would dare come into my lair," Scarecrow said.

"Yeah, sure, Scary-Pants."

"I should gas you."

"That paints a bigger target on you for whoever is out there," Switch said.

_**Ccrrrksh!**_

"Fuck!" Switch cursed, cradling her jaw. "Why'd you hit me?" She demanded.

"I'm over here, I didn't hit you. Not that I wouldn't have. Get the car. Some fear gas will give them plenty of incentive to undo their errors."

"With pleasure."

"Scarecrow," a voice growled.

"Shit! Bondageman!" Switch yelled.

"What?" Scarecrow asked, surprise tainting his voice.

"Nevermind, just run!" Switch yelled!

* * *

"So, wait. You used to work to work for the GCPD?" Clarice asked.

"Yes, I did," Edward smirked.

"How fascinating. Tell me, how'd the officers feel when they found out that you were, well, Enigma?" She asked. His smirk slipped off and he glared at the table.

"Well, they certainly let me know how they felt. With their fists," He said.

"Oh, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to-"

_Ring ring ring._

"Oh, geesh," Clarice rolled her eyes and grabbed her phone from her purse. "It's Switch. Must be important if she was going to interrupt our date. Hello?"

"_**WE NEED YOUR HELP**_!" Switch yelled into the phone. Clarice held her phone away from her head.

"Wha-what? Slow down," Clarice said. Riddler winced. He could hear every word Switch said.

"_**BONDAGEMAN IS AT YOUR LAIR!**_"

"What?" Riddler and Clarice snapped.

"_**JUST FIND A WAY TO END YOUR FAKE DATE AND SA**_-_crunch_."

"Fake. Date?" Riddler asked, glaring at her.

"Um, uh...surprise?"

"Fake date?" He demanded.

"Look, Edward, I-"

"_**Fake date**_?"

"Edward?" His hands started to twitch. "Edward?"

"This isn't a real date?" He demanded. "I made reservations at the best restaurant in Gotham, I wore my best suit, I-" He closed his eyes for a moment to calm himself. "Let's go," he told her, standing.

"What?"

"Let's. Go. Clarice."

"Look, Edwa-"

"_Let's go!_" He snarled. Clarice bit her lip and followed him out of the restaurant to his car. He opened her door for her and slammed it shut once she was in the car.

* * *

_**A/N: Alright, so it's shorter, but still good.**_

_**Stitcher:**_

_**Practically a sin? It is a sin! And I feel really bad for Edward!**_

_**Batty:**_

_**Poor, poor Eddy. But yeah, he kinda sorta deserves it.**_


	7. Chapter 7

"Did you ever think about how I would feel?" He finally demanded after driving for a few minutes in silence.

"I'm sorry, Edward," Clarice said quietly, staring at her hands in her lap. "I really, really shouldn't- I just thought that maybe if I annoyed you enough, you'd leave me-"

"Shut up, it's my turn to talk. If you don't remember, you've been doing most of it all night," He snapped. Clarice nodded, feeling actual tears sting her eyes. "Did you ever stop to think that maybe I was persistent because I thought I actually liked you?"

"No, I honestly just thou-"

"Perhaps its hard for _you and Deborah to understand_, but I am not a robot!" He snarled.

"Edward, I'm really sorr-" Oh, God, the tears were starting to leak. Why? Why was she crying? She wiped furiously at her eyes.

"Oh, stop with that!" He snapped.

"I can't! I can't stop! I'm sorry, I'm so sorry!" Clarice cried, burying her face in her hands. "Just forget I'm even here, I'm sorry! I'll stop, I really will, I promise! I'll try!" These weren't fake. They were real tears. And she _really_ couldn't stop them.

Edward sighed.

"Clarice-"

"I know, I'm a horrible person!"

"Clari-"

"Just make me walk the rest of the way, I deserve it!"

"In those heels?" Edward asked, looking at her shoes dubiously. "I don't think so. Besides, we need to save your little partner-in-crime. So I can kill both of you at the same time."

* * *

"Where are they?" Switch demanded, swinging her flashlight around, trying to find the Caped Crusader.

"They're on their way, if your panicked voice was any tip off that something was wrong," Jonathan snapped, standing next to her. Both were wearing gas masks and each had a weapon of some form.

* * *

"Why does this happen to me?" Clarice demanded, glaring at the sky.

"Run, you idiot!" Edward snapped, grabbing her wrist and pulling her down the streets. Bullets wizzed past the two as they ran.

"Give me a minute, at least let me ditch the heels!" Clarice yelled.

"You didn't bring more practical footwear?" Edward asked.

"I didn't think we'd be chased by idiots with guns!"

"Honestly?" He asked in surprise. "How could you not?"

"You jackass!"

She managed to make him stop so she could toe off her heels. They started running again.

"You just _had_ to pass through gang territory, didn't you!" Clarice snapped.

"Well, I'm sorry, but your boss-"

"_Friend_!"

"Friend, then, decided to have his lair in gang territory!"

"Whatev- Ugh!" Clarice fell.

"What's wrong?" Edward demanded, turning to look at her. His eyes went wide when he saw the blossoming bloodstain on her torso. He rushed back over to her and helped get her to her feet. "Do you think you can run?"

"I'd better be able to," She grunted. They took off as fast as they could and Edward's face lit up.

"I have a hideout near here, if we can make it-"

"We should be safe?" Clarice asked.

"Yes."

"Oh, Thank god!"

* * *

"Where is he?" Switch whispered.

"I don't kn-" _TWING!_

"RUN!" Switch yelled, pushing Jonathan through the halls and out of the lair. The two hopped into her car and they sped off. "Why does this always happen to me?"

* * *

"I have to stop, Edward," Clarice moaned, the gunshot wound hurting more than before.

He groaned. "We're almost there!"

"It-"

"Here," Edward mumbled.

"What're you- Wh-"

Edward took part of the skirt of her dress in his hands and ripped it.

"That dress was expensive! I actually paid for it! And you ruined it!"

"There was no way you were getting the blood out of it," He said. He wrapped the fabric around her torso in a makeshift bandage. "And now, it's applying pressure so you don't bleed out."

"Yeah, well," Clarice mumbled. She looked up at him. "Thanks."

"I'd say you're welco-" Clarice grabbed his tie and pulled him down closer to her. She looked into his eyes for a moment before pressing her lips to his. She closed her eyes and almost let her foot raise before scolding herself.

He placed his hands on her hips and-

"Riddler," A voice growled.

The two broke apart and stared wide eyed at the Batman.

"I thought he was terrorizing-"

"Just run!" Edward snapped. He grabbed her arm and pulled her away, winding through roads and alleys and-

"Oof!" Clarice fell.

Edward growled. "Just get on," He said, leaning down in front of her.

"What?!"

"Just get on!"

"Okay!" She crawled onto his back and winced as he ran.

Until-

_**CCCRRRRCK!**_

"Agh!" Clarice wimpered

"Are you okay?" Edward whispered, trying to help her up.

"N-no. My ankle. Something's wrong with-"

* * *

Switch and Scarecrow glared at each other.

"This is all your fault," They snapped at each other. "No, it's yours!"

"I hate you," Switch muttered.

"The feeling is mutual."

The police van doors opened and the two occupants turned to look at the newcomers.

First, Clarice hobbled in and sat down with a sigh while applying pressure to her wound followed by Edward who was cursing at the pain in his back

The newcomers stared at the occupants and likewise, the occupants stared at the newcomers.

"What happened, then?" Switch asked through her split lip, a bloody bubble popping as she spoke.

"A gang war. Batman, you know, the usual. You too?"

"Batman," Scarecrow snapped, one side of his face a bruised mess.

"At least you didn't have to carry an injured idiot who had inappropriate footwear and throw out your back," Edward muttered scathingly. Switch struggled to cut back the snort of laughter that escaped.

"At least you weren't dropped without warning and twisted an ankle," Clarice snarled at him.

"I didn't drop you! Batman landed on us!"

"Of course he did."

"I shouldn't have helped you at all tonight."

"Why?"

"**Fake. Date.**"

* * *

_**A/N:**_

_**Batty:**_

_**BONDAGEMAAAAAAN! Oh, Goodness, you're going to love a story that Stitcher and I are working on. It's hilarious!**_

_**Oh, can we steal Jester? I'm thinking the three girls should have a GNO.**_

_**Stitcher:**_

_**I feel bad for all four rogues. They just have the shittiest luck EVER. They are very lucky Bondageman doesn't kill :)**_

_**More to come soon!**_


End file.
